By Merry Tejalaksana
Being a mother is probably one of the most difficult decisions women ever make in lives, next to decisions to work, choose a life partner, get married, etc. A woman must be ready physically and mentally to be one.
I had to go through the same situation before. My husband and I got married at the end of the year. I still had my last injection for HPV vaccination due the following month, so by doctor’s advice we ought to delay the plan to concieve a child. It didn’t matter much to me as I still wanted to enjoy the togetherness with my husband. However, my husband wanted to have a child as soon as possible, due to the age factor (he didn’t want to miss playing around and giving a piggy/rocket ride to his children because of physical aging) and I can understand that.
Fortunately, the doctor who gave the injection is a friend of us and she decided to give the final shot 2 weeks earlier than the due time (which is still ok). Because there hasn’t been any research about the effect of the vaccination and pregnancy, I wanted to be prudent and wait for a-month-time to try concieving the baby. Nevertheless, my husband wanted to try after 2 weeks (by the doctor advise).
Therefore, I was also feeling not ready to be a mother, too much in stake, I thought. However, I gave in to my husband’s will and anxiously waited for the following month’s result…
I had my period the following month. I was both relieved and a little disappointed. Then, on March I didn’t have my period. I thought it was normal as I usually have it on different date every month. My husband then insisted to buy the testing pack and I tested it. 2 stripes!!! Wow!! My husband leaped in joy. He even danced like a little boy getting a candy bar ^^. We also went to a doctor to make sure. My pregnancy was already 6-weeks-old. I had a mixed feeling that time. I was happy but at the same time worried about being a mother.
After knowing that I was pregnant, my husband became so over-protective (in a good way, though). However, I felt rather annoyed and kind of blamed my pregnancy for not being able to eat ‘sambal’ and durian juice T.T well… I guess I was being selfish that time. Then, God gave me quite a lesson as a reminder to be thankful.
I taught junior high students and our classroom happened to be upstairs. So, I went up and down so often everyday. One afternoon, I remember it was on March 18th, 2010 (on my husband’s birthday), during the lunch break I went to pee and there was a drop of red blood. I was so shocked and shivering I went to the administration office to call my husband, who taught at the other building. He was surprised and panicked as well. The school doctor advised me to lie down resting. I remember I was so scared of losing my baby. I felt guilty too for being ‘annoyed’ and blaming earlier. I cried and some fellow teachers and students consoled me and prayed for me. We went to a doctor and I was suggested to have bedrest for couple days. What an unforgettable birthday for my husband!
Thank God after a week of bedresting I got better and the bleeding stopped. It was like a reminder from God that a child is His precious gift and being a mother is such a great previlege. That particular event did hit me right in the gut and I started to accept the fact that I was going to be a mother. I didn’t regret any moment of it and the exciting journey was just begun…^^
Months of surprises
It’s so much fun to see your tummy getting bigger every month! The worry of looking ‘big,”fat’ or ‘ugly’ is a piece of cake as God gives sweet surprises on these months of waiting.
My students’ parents gave me a devotion book for pregnant woman. It is such a good book! It tells us the fetus development and from there we were inspired to pray for our baby. On the month when his internal organs were knitted by God, we prayed for healthy ones. On the month when his ears were formed, we prayed that God blesses them and they would hear the needing cries. When his eyes were formed, we prayed that he would see through Your eyes of compassion, and so on. We had such a great fun imagining how our baby would be. We always waited the moment to check on the doctor as we would get a new usg-photo of our baby.
The first kick was memorable! A great feeling I had when I felt our baby. The times when our baby had hiccups were also joyous! The moments when our baby responded to our voice were certainly unforgettable, too.
The surprise was also about knowing that our baby was in ‘head’s-up’ position (the normal one should be up-side down). This caused me to pee quite often at night as our baby’s feet gave a kick on my bladder. One day at dawn, I woke up soaked wet. I quickly rushed to the bathroom and changed. Then, a weary thought struck me. Was it because I wetted my pants or the amniotic water leaked? I was so scared that I woke up my husband. We both stared and smelled the bed to investigate further (yes, we did!!^^). We couldn’t sleep. I was worried lying on our bed while my husband searched on the net for more information. After an hour or so, we concluded that it was pee because I didn’t wake up that night to go to the loo. Furthermore, amniotic water is like the rice-rinsing water (air tajin) and stiffens the cloth when it’s dry. We laughed ourselves out after that case. It gave us a chance to laugh in weary and trust God in everything. This also gave me a chance to exercise and do some activities to help our baby move around. I kneeled and bowed down for at least 10 minutes almost every night, and also wiped the floor in the old time way (kneeling down and wiping the floor). It was quite an exercise, but my beloved husband supported and cheered me up. We also prayed for God’s intercede and spoke to our baby to move around. Praise the Lord! Our baby moved around and was up-side down.
Another surprise came when we found out that our baby’s neck was wrapped around by the umbilical cord. We were worried but trusted that God could do a miracle. We searched for lots of information from the net. It was a normal case and wasn’t dangerous as long as the wrapping wasn’t tight (indicated by normal growth of the baby and usg photo). So, there we were, praying earnestly for God’s deliverance…(To be continued)
Lord, teach us from Your holy Word
The truth that we must know,
And help us share the joyous news
with all little ones around us. Amen